Capital Destroys All It Touches

“What’s our death toll up to in this week’s boutique pay lots of money and die fashionably sweepstakes? 19?”

The death toll from mountain climbing capitalism is climbing. Er, I mean mounting. Er, uh, rising? The Guardian‘s take on this: Wealth from Destructive Capitalism is Destructive. Who knew?

And of course there’s a podcast about it all.

Stupor Bowl Sunday As It Happens Happened

“19:56: We popped over to the Puppy Bowl in time for some nauseating exploitation. But I hope it helps some puppies.
“19:57: Fourth first down? They’re showing signs of life? And Romo is a totally sarcastic smartass. And the Rams get one more first down.
“20:02: Suddenly Rams show a spark. But McCordy smacks the ball outta the hands of the Rams receiver in the end zone. Frustration on the sidelines.” | Read more after the jump:

Have no earthly idea why, but s I’m livebloggin’ this thing. You could encounter boredom and outrage and other acts of writing regurgitation.

17:36: After stomping down the field with run plays, Brady’s first pass is intercepted. Crap on a cracker.

17:39: Rams do nothing. Third and out. Juli’s punt return not great. Now for the usual over-hyped commercials.

17:41: Hulu smashes it outta the park with a Handmaid’s Tale ad throwing Reagan’s “Morning in America” barf campaign ad back in his face. Awesome.

17:47: Time out early, Pats. Neither team has calmed down from early hype. If NE can keep Brady on the field, they can wear out the Rams defense.

17:49: Turkish Airlines: A Ridley Scott film? Seriously?

17:50: Give Gronk ball. Gronk run. Run, Gronk, run. Gronk run 17 yards. Good Gronk, good.

17:52: Second Pats timeout? Whuh?

17:54: Weird social justice/Dr. King legacy/NFL trying to … blackwash (?!) their Kaepernick problems … without mentioning Kaepernick. Ridiculous.

17:56: Gostkowski … misses a field goal?! That’ll come back to haunt them.

18:03: Rams got nothin’ but a penalty. Brady coming out for third time from their 19.

18:07: Hogan drops a pass. Y’all need to settle down, boys.

18:08: Julian gets a good one.

18:09: What are you doing, Tom??!! Yeesh!

18:10: Go, Gronk, go!! Smash, Gronk, smash!

18:11: And they have to punt. Is this gonna be a boring one? Rams have 24 yards of offense and Tom has been kinda weak. End of first quarter. 0-0.

18:17: Rams still go nuthin’. Almost bobbled an interception, which would have been a touchdown.

18:21: Gronk catch, but Gronk short.

18:22: Go Juli! Go Juli! Awesome.

18:23: Tom misses Chris. Long third down.

18:24: Gronk get ball, but Gronk short again. Tom mad. Gostkowski redeems himself for the earlier miss? Yes! Finally points. 3-0, Pats. The ice breaker?

18:28: Rams are only running. Not far, but they’re running.

18:29: Jared finally tosses an 18-yarder. Should have been challenged. Where’s Bill’s head right now?

18:30: Rams stuffed on ground again. Good on yer, Pats defense. And they have to punt. Get your act together now, Tom!

18:31: Complete asshole/bro dipshit/douchy whiteboy commanding everything around him to respond to his commands because … he owns a Mercedes. A pox on thee, Mercedes, a pox.

18:40: Some things happened. The commercials are idiotic as always. I’m bored. Why do the Rams keep running the ball? Why don’t they let the Saints suit up and take over?

18:41: Goff just got smacked to the ground. Van Noy!!! Awesome. And then they punt. And here comes more insipidness. Every year, for the millions spent on these stupid ads, they could … end homelessness. Buy patients drugs they can’t afford. Ensure health care for millions. God.

18:47: Two-minute warning. Halftime. Which will be completely ignored. Maybe I’ll go scrub the toilet. That would be more fun.

18:49: Sarah Jessica Parker and Jeff Bridges doing a Stella Artois commercial with her flaunting big cleavage and him flaunting his ability to still remember his lines?

18:50: Mass confusion. Rams have 14? men on the field.

17:36: After stomping down the field with run plays, Brady’s first pass is intercepted. Crap on a cracker.

17:39: Rams do nothing. Third and out. Juli’s punt return not great. Now for the usual over-hyped commercials.

17:41: Hulu smashes it outta the park with a Handmaid’s Tale ad throwing Reagan’s “Morning in America” barf campaign ad back in his face. Awesome.

17:47: Time out early, Pats. Neither team has calmed down from early hype. If NE can keep Brady on the field, they can wear out the Rams defense.

17:49: Turkish Airlines: A Ridley Scott film? Seriously?

17:50: Give Gronk ball. Gronk run. Run, Gronk, run. Gronk run 17 yards. Good Gronk, good.

17:52: Second Pats timeout? Whuh?

17:54: Weird social justice/Dr. King legacy/NFL trying to … blackwash (?!) their Kaepernick problems … without mentioning Kaepernick. Ridiculous.

17:56: Gostkowski … misses a field goal?! That’ll come back to haunt them.

18:03: Rams got nothin’ but a penalty. Brady coming out for third time from their 19.

18:07: Hogan drops a pass. Y’all need to settle down, boys.

18:08: Julian gets a good one.

18:09: What are you doing, Tom??!! Yeesh!

18:10: Go, Gronk, go!! Smash, Gronk, smash!

18:11: And they have to punt. Is this gonna be a boring one? Rams have 24 yards of offense and Tom has been kinda weak. End of first quarter. 0-0.

18:17: Rams still go nuthin’. Almost bobbled an interception, which would have been a touchdown.

18:21: Gronk catch, but Gronk short.

18:22: Go Juli! Go Juli! Awesome.

18:23: Tom misses Chris. Long third down.

18:24: Gronk get ball, but Gronk short again. Tom mad. Gostkowski redeems himself for the earlier miss? Yes! Finally points. 3-0, Pats. The ice breaker?

18:28: Rams are only running. Not far, but they’re running.

18:29: Jared finally tosses an 18-yarder. Should have been challenged. Where’s Bill’s head right now?

18:30: Rams stuffed on ground again. Good on yer, Pats defense. And they have to punt. Get your act together now, Tom!

18:31: Complete asshole/bro dipshit/douchy whiteboy commanding everything around him to respond to his commands because … he owns a Mercedes. A pox on thee, Mercedes, a pox.

18:40: Some things happened. The commercials are idiotic as always. I’m bored. Why do the Rams keep running the ball? Why don’t they let the Saints suit up and take over?

18:41: Goff just got smacked to the ground. Van Noy!!! Awesome. And then they punt. And here comes more insipidness. Every year, for the millions spent on these stupid ads, they could … end homelessness. Buy patients drugs they can’t afford. Ensure health care for millions. God.

18:47: Two-minute warning. Halftime. Which will be completely ignored. Maybe I’ll go scrub the toilet. That would be more fun.

18:49: Sarah Jessica Parker and Jeff Bridges doing a Stella Artois commercial with her flaunting big cleavage and him flaunting his ability to still remember his lines?

18:50: Mass confusion. Rams have 14? men on the field.

18:53: Going for a fourth-and-one. And … Gronk can’t hold on, just past his fingertips. Rams ball. Damn.

18:55: But Goff bites the astroturf. Then fires a pass, but too little too late. Then hits the turf with a low pass. 28 seconds left. Rams do nothing, nothing, nothing. Six punts. This one downed at Pats two, but the half is 16 seconds away. Don’t do something stupid here.

18:57: And here’s the half. Second lowest scoring Stupor Bowl in history. Stadium sounds like there’s no one in it.

19:18: Is this stupid halftime thing over yet?

19:23: ADT and Property Brothers threatening us that we’re gonna see a lot more of them. Please God, no.

19:29: Kick the ball and let’s get this thing going.

19:30: Goff passes right to … Highland, a New England defender, who can’t hold on to the ball. Then somebody runs. It’s pretty much the first half again.

19:32: Injury. And a guy in what looks like purple eyeshadow says something about Belicheck not saying anything of substance. Then a stupid ad with a kid being exploited to sell South Korean cars made in Georgia.

19:35: Broken arm. Gets the biggest crowd reaction yet. Bloodthirsty buggers down there in Atlanta.

19:37: Goff heads for the bench again. Pats getting the punt. Go Juli. He has more yards gained than the entire Rams offense.

19:38: Tom calls “Reagan! Reagan!” It’s a run to the right. Like Reagan, overblown.

19:40: Julian takes a pass and gets 37 yards. Woooooot! Julian MVP? He has 120+ yards, so why not?

19:43: And they have to punt. <sigh>

19:46: Rams in the hole, get a penalty.

19:47: Am I the only one bugged that the navy blue on the Rams’ helmets doesn’t match the blue on their jerseys? And Goff almost gets a safety. And they make their eighth punt. But it’s a 65-yarder … longest punt in Stupor Bowl history. It’s a dubious achievement, but there it is.

19:48: More feel gooding, this time first responders get their due in order to be exploited by those assholes at Verizon. Love first responders, Verizon can bite me.

19:56: We popped over to the Puppy Bowl in time for some nauseating exploitation. But I hope it helps some puppies.

19:57: Fourth first down? They’re showing signs of life? And Romo is a totally sarcastic smartass. And the Rams get one more first down.

20:02: Suddenly Rams show a spark. But McCordy smacks the ball outta the hands of the Rams receiver in the end zone. Frustration on the sidelines.

20:03: Goff gets totally snuffed into the turf. Bam! From Hightower.

20:04: Rams get a long field goal. It’s 3-3. How thrilling. First 50+-yard field goal in 15 years.

20:08: Holding on the Rams.

20:10: And three quarters are gone. 3-3 at 53.

20:13: First Stupor Bowl ever where there hasn’t been a touchdown in three quarters. And then Tom hits the turf. And they punt.

20:16: Goff flubs it and marches 5 yards back.

20:18: 12:23 to go and Pats take timeout. Please God don’t send us to overtime.

20:22: Goff gets plowed into the turf again. Flag on field: Holding, Pats. Geez, boys.

20:24: Holding on the Rams.

20:26: Goff gets bowled into the sideline spectators. Then a pass that was nothing.

20:28: Burger King digs up Andy Warhol’s corpse to flog whoppers. Now it’s folk songs calling for communist overthrow being used to flog beer.

20:29: All Pats Super Bowls decided in last three minutes and by small number of points. Yup. Go Gronk go!!!!

20:31: Julian’s 10th catch. Nice.

20:32: GRONK GRONK GRONK!!!! Will we finally get a TD in this game?

20:33: PATRIOTS SCORE TD FINALLY!!!!! WOOOOOT! Thank you Gronk! 10-3. Whew.

20:35: Not amusing Amazon commercial. Cripes.

20:36: Okay, you got 7 minutes to go boys. Do it.

20:41: Thank God. Some Rams things happened then a beautiful interception. Pats defense should be MVPs!

20:45: 26 yards gets them some space. Plus illegal use of hands by the Rams.

20:47: Some confusion over time. Time out LA.

20:48: 26 yards by Burkette. Yes!

20:50: Two Patriots penalties?! Justified, I’m afraid. Calm down.

20:51: Belicheck is MADDDDDDDD. No one knows what happened. Two minute warning!

20:55: Washington Post “Democracy Dies in Darkness” ad. Hmmmmm. You should have given murdered and threatened journalists much more airplay. But it’s a start.

20:58: Gostkowski wins the Stupor Bowl for the Pats. Good on ya boys!

21:00: Here’s the last minute. Rams’ last gasp.

21:03: 48 yard field goal try, but won’t work. It’s wide left. Brady and company celebrating.

21:04: Kneel down, Tom. And congrats. That’s the ol’ ball game.

21:09: Madness on field. MVP should be Juli. And it is.

21:26: Finally the trophy. Yeesh. Belicheck is touching a child. Wow.

21:30: Juli’s kind of a goober like Tom. But congrats to his … amazing game. And I’m out. Night!


[Text by Steve. Photo by Nathan Gonthier on Unsplash. ]


—30—

Finally Entering the Public Domain

We’re finally getting some « spectacular stuff » released into the public domain on New Year’s Day (screw you Disney!).

We’re finally getting some « spectacular stuff » released into the public domain on New Year’s Day (screw you Disney!).

WWI Collides with D&D and Memes

It’s two years old, but I’m just seeing it for the first time. It’s « one of the best visual “explainers” » I’ve seen that describes the spark which ignited World War I.

It tells the story of that horrible June day in 1914 via a series of memes and the lens of a Dungeons and Dragons session.

Given that the spark (predicted by Bismarck to be some “damn fool thing in the Balkans”) ignited two large-scale global wars AND that over the next half-century upwards of 150 million humans and untold animals would die from the cascade of events following that spark, well, it’s a story well-worth knowing, telling, re-telling and making as relevant as possible to generations down through time.

Every Building

“On this page you will find maps showing almost every building in the United States. Why did we make such a thing? We did it as an opportunity for you to connect with the country’s cities and explore them in detail.”

I’ve always loved maps and could spend hours poring over them. From the old gas station maps at my father’s Malco station in Roswell to Google Earth, there’s always something fascinating in maps and data and all that.

The New York Times recently posted«a map of every building in America» and it’s worth many hours of your time. Awesome stuff! Have a look.

“On this page you will find maps showing almost every building in the United States. Why did we make such a thing? We did it as an opportunity for you to connect with the country’s cities and explore them in detail. To find the familiar, and to discover the unfamiliar. So … look. Every black speck on the map below is a building, reflecting the built legacy of the United States.”

Golden stuff for map/data nerds like me.

TCM Tonight: Summer Under the Stars – Joan Crawford

Of COURSE we had to watch some Joan tonight. Not taking time to behold the wonder that is our patron saint, Lucille LeSueur, would be anathema, blasphemy, time wasted!

Poster of Sudden Fear Movie
Sudden Fear Movie Poster

First up was 1952’s Sudden Fear — Joan with Jack Palance, Gloria Grahame, Bruce Bennett, Virginia Hudson and Mike “Touch” / “Mannix” Connors. David Miller directed. Playwright takes up with menacing actor Palance, who is really plotting with Gloria Grahame (who else?) to knock off Joan and take all her fabulous wealth. Mike Connors is there to be supposedly pretty and try to romance Gloria Grahame, who brushes him off because, of course, she likes being smacked around by her dreamboat Palance. Also, she has a closet with handy poison and a gun all ready to go.

Summary: “After an ambitious actor insinuates himself into the life of a wealthy middle-aged playwright and marries her, he plots with his mistress to murder her.”

IMDb.

Fabulous quotes:

Myra Hudson: “Remember what Nietzsche says ‘Live dangerously!'”
Lester Blaine: “You know what happened to Nietzsche?”
Myra Hudson: “No, what?”
Lester Blaine: “He’s dead.”

Lester Baine and Myra Hudson, Sudden Fear

“I was just wondering what I’d done to deserve you.” 

Myra Hudson, Sudden Fear
Harriet Craig movie poster
Movie poster of Harriet Craig, 1952.

Next up was 1950s Harriet Craig — Joan with Wendell Corey, Lucile Watson, Allyn Joslyn, William Bishop, K.T. Stevens and Ellen Corby. Directed by Vincent Sherman. She plays, what else, a Mommie Dearest without the kids, who actually hates kids, disorder, had to work to survive in a laundry and other foul places, but who now worships a perfectly clean, massive house and a Ming vahse and browbeats the servants and the little boy next door. Only thing missing is cans of Dutch Cleanser. Harriet is my paternal grandmother with money, youth, and better tailoring. Now THAT woman knew how to clean! The Ming vahse fails to survive the picture, as does her marriage.

Summary: “Domineering Harriet Craig holds more regard for her home and its possessions than she does for any person in her life. Among those she treats like household objects are her kind husband Walter, whom she has lied to about her inability to have children; her cousin Claire, whom she treats like a secretary; and her servants whom she treats like slaves.”

IMDb

Fabulous quotes:

“No man’s born ready for marriage; he has to be trained.” 

Harriet Craig.

“I’m going next door. Where the scheming widow lives.” 

Walter Craig.
Movie Poster of Torch Song

We also caught the tail end of Torch Song from 1953, with its infamous scene of Joan doing some serious legwork and vamping in full black face lip synching as India Adams sings Two Faced Woman and one of Elizabeth Taylor’s husbands, Michael Wilding, playing blind, complete with drunken old biddy mother, seeing eye dog and costumes and more lip synching and other acts of violent culture appropriation.

Summary: “Jenny Stewart is a tough Broadway musical star who doesn’t take criticism from anyone. Yet there is one individual, Tye Graham, a blind pianist who may be able to break through her tough exterior.”

IMDb

Fabulous quotes:

“Your idea of art’s the fruit in the slot machine.”

Jenny Stewart

Jenny: “Carl, after you drop me will you take Mr. Norton home?” Carl: “Yes ma’am. What’s your address Mr. Norton?” Jenny: “Any dark bar.”

Jenny Stewart and her chauffeur

Joan emotes with aforementioned Michael Wilding, as well as Gig Young, the always fabulous Marjorie Rambeau, Harry Morgan, and Maidie Norman, who plays the usual part reserved for women of color: the maid, who remains completely silent when the white folk smudge their faces with charcoal, paint on big lips and start singin’ field hand songs. (Maidie was five hundred times the actor Joan was, but made-up black face gets Oscars and real black face gets two lines talking about how dinner or the fancy white woman dress is ready. Ms. Norman and Ms. Rambeau are pretty much the only redeeming features of this one, as well as a little bit of Mr. Wilding’s handsome mug. Should’ve been titled Black Face Lip Synching Song, but theaters in the south would have been all in a snit and shit. If you’re not into being entertained by many appalling elements in a 90-minute period, skip Torch SongSudden Fear and Harriet Craig I can personally recommend.

Tonight is the end of this year’s Summer Under the Stars. How appropriate to end it with Dearest Joan. And that fabulous production, Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? so that Bette Davis can yet again trample on Joan’s special Summer Under the Stars day.

It’s now September. Thank god. This summer weather-wise and otherwise was brutal. Fall can’t get here fast enough.